Heirarchies Of Acknowledgement & Hardly Ridables... oh & How To React To An Anti Blog!?

Well i should start by addressing Bootleg's Anti Biker Blog really.... Dude i freekin loved it and you should carry on with it - who's gonna stop you now anyway??! You've got a unique observational way of writing... God forbid anyone who tries to supress you!  From what ive blogged so far you might have got the impression that i "love" every biker on the road but its far from the truth.

Hierarchies:  Mentioned "letting on" not so far back and its an interesting thing.  Joggers do it, dog walkers,  people who drive the original mini's flash their lights at each other in acknowledgement, bus drivers wave their little waves at one-another:  its obviously because they share a commen interest/passion but its slightly different for a Biker.  The worst for it is a BMW rider but first i'll quickly drop a list of the worst offenders.

Ok in EVERY particular order:

BMW owners

MV Augusta/Ducati

Harley Davidson

Cruiser (Dragstars - Shadows - Rockets etc)

Goldwings

Jap Pocket Rockets (GSXR1000 - R1 - Blades - Ninjas)

Couriers (GT550 Old Style Baby!)

Enfields

Mid Range Tourers (Fazers - Hornets - Suzuki Sv's etc)

Grey Imports (CBR4's Nc30's etc)

Two Stroke Screamers (Bottleg's Kitten Stranglers)

Scooters

C90's (Chicken Chasers)

And Finally Lambretta's (Italiano chic)

You would think all the above would acknowledge each other on the road in their shared interest of two-wheeled-ness? Do they Bollocks! The greatest times for most of the above is summertime, you feel ace, minimal clothing but enough to protect if youve got any brains/sense, and you can nod at most without the worry of getting blanked and at the end of the day your neck hurts like mad but in sad way you feel like you are a biker and have made many fictional friends.  Other times of the year this is simply not the case so be hesitant to who you let on to because it could end in tears if you are a sensitive soul. 

A BMW rider is above you - all of you - that's German Efficiancy Throbbing between his thighs godammit, he will acknowledge other BMW fanatics ONLY because they too have found the definitive secret and have reached that pinnacle in their motorcycling career that they cannot be touched by human hands - they are Gods so dont let on to them expecting a return nod coz it just aint happening. 

An MV Augusta is damned expensive - heres a little pic:

Drop this bike and you could be waiting for a front brake lever for 6 months at least - im guessing the silver fairing on the side will cost you £500 as opposed to a similar Honda Fireblade @ £250.

These are one of the elite sports bikes and the riders of them know it and you are beneath them because at the end of the day: this isnt a sport or a pastime to these people, nah its about money.

I'll get to Harley's later:  I may have put Cruiser riders and Goldwing owners in the wrong spot coz they aint all bad.  Ok my beard isnt long enough to warrant an acknowledgement off these guys yet but the secret of my success if you wanna call it that is just not to nod at anyone - i'm over it.  Someone nods at me then they get one back - been past that many ignorant riders, that my conclusion is: that sometimes you gotta keep yourself to yourself.

Couriers and mid range Tourers are mile clockers.  They have ridden 10 times more miles than you and either find a peaceful equlibrium within themselves where they are the friendliest people alive or are the complete opposite: snooty bollocks.

Grey Import sports bikes are the original Pocket Rockets and belong in the same bracket as the Two Stroke Screamers who aspire to be them (at this point in their riding carrer).  They get on ok!

Scooter riders shouldnt nod at anyone really, unfortunately they are the lowest of the low and usually considered to be on a stop gap between using public transport and buying a car and thats where their two-wheeled history stops and starts. 

Unbeknownst to most smart arses a Honda C90 rider has been there and done it all!  He had the meanest fastest bikes of his generation and has mellowed ever so much in his twilight years and is perfectly happy to do a thousand miles to the gallon and look silly in his bright yellow reflective jacket - these guys won the war for us man! Respect them.... the only riders i freely acknowledge and you always get one back.

Italian scooter riders are special - absolutely unique - have you tried riding a 1960 Lambretta?? The damn things dont even have indicators!  Yep these riders have a niche of their own and i dont know anything about them or what the weather is like on their respective planets so i'll leave it there.

Dont think any of the above was conclusive but this is encroaching on my Burnout time so i'm rushing like a fool at this point.  Maybe the conclusion should be that all the above groups can only be confidant within their current riding groups that acknowledgement will always be reciprocated - dont try to fit into other brackets coz it just aint happening!

Harley Davidsons:  I know 1 or 2 thinks about these bikes/bikers and thats it!  I know we Jap fans call them Hardly Ridables and i also know that we had a Harley V-Rod in one of our showrooms for sale for about 2 years because the damn things just dont depreciate - AT ALL!  Oh and the finish is totally crap on them - well it was on the V-Rod anyway!

A dealership opened up very close to in the middle of nowhere in an exclusive spot overlooking a huge valley so it was very picturesque.  It overlooked the entire valley  thing and i'd pop in from time time for service consumables an stuff on weekends and for a coffee etc and got to know the owner "Bill" For security i'll give him a false name "William".... Sh*t you idiot! I hate rushing! Ok he was called Bill! This guy Bill had made millions in cranes and was getting on a little bit so he shut his business and bought the rights to be franchised Harley - then he buys a plot of land land and builds this awesome showroom near my house so i'm made up! Love it.

He's just a tinker kind of guy - takes a stock Harley and puts about 20 grand into each project he takes on and builds these weird and wonderfull chop Harleys - each one absolutely unique and displays them in his shop for sale.  They all sell.  And this guy is so mellow its untrue and the more time i spend in there im anchoring and pining to ride Harleys so i do a foolish thing and ask him for a job "Bill i'm like 10 seconds away from you dude, come on man you know i can do the job an' if im ever late its coz ive died in my sleep or something - id love to work with you blah blah blah" Bill tells me this "Son, there are many universal truths with Harleys, Harley Riders  and with me, these are those:  Harley riders are complete T*ssers (sorry for the language) they suck the big one and you will struggle with a Jap background to get on with them - i can see it in you: you will never ride a Harley.  Harleys are freekin shite, i wish i'd picked another venture to pass my time with.  And me? I'm the worst kinda boss you could imagine, i didnt get here by being nice to good folk like yourself, you work for me and you will regret it and as much as i'd like to have you i'm gonna save you the pain and say no - stick to your Jap crap kid"  That was that and that was Bill.

Ok now im really itching for a slice of Burnout pie so im off but the next Blog is dedicated to Foxy as it is her idea and a great and important one at that.  Until next bloggy!